I’ve been thinking about happiness lately.

Is it a hedonistic pursuit? Is it the ultimate human pursuit? Is it something our chemical make-up graces us with, or condemns us to be without? Is it a natural by-product of a simple life?

I looked around the web a bit and found that psychologists have been slow to study “happiness” because of stigma. There was respect to be earned by discovering the causes of depression or other mental/emotional pains but ridicule to play in the fields of understanding happiness.

According to Alison Stein Wellner and David Adox’s article, “Happy Days - positive psychology movement” published May, 2000 in Psychology Today,

in the psychological literature over the last 30 years, there have been 54,040 abstracts containing the keyword “depression,” 41,416 naming “anxiety,” but only 415 mentioning “joy”.

My perspective of life tends towards the understanding that we create our reality. Where we focus our thoughts and our intentions is where our life will flow. If I focus on negativity, it shall reproduce. If I focus on positivity, it shall reproduce. Therefore, I’m grateful to Martin E.P. Seligman, Ph.D., founder of the Positive Psychology movement. From the Executive Summary page:

Positive Psychology is founded on the belief that people want more than an end to suffering. People want to lead meaningful and fulfilling lives, to cultivate what is best within themselves, to enhance their experiences of love, work, and play.

Thanks, Dr. Martin!

I also found a number of articles written, with the theme of happiness, published in fall 2005 in The Times (UK). One of the fascinating assertions about when we experience happiness from Libby Purves’ article, “Happiness is a work in progress”:

But wherever it [happiness] comes from, every life needs those moments of pure and perilous balance: a neat, sweet coming together of control and risk and effort and exultation. That is the peak of happiness. The lower slopes and green valleys lie around it, with their harvest of mild daily contentments: company, mutuality, family, freedom from envy and rancour and self-contempt. We need ordinary things too. But the valleys are weary and sour if there is no mountaintop.

Here’s another perspective from Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi’s, “The Secrets of Happiness”. (By the way, he co-edited, along with Dr. Martin EP Seligman, a special edition of American Psychologist dedicated to Positive Psychology published in January 2000) He did a number of studies and found that:

The most obvious component of happiness, I found out, is intense concentration, which is the main reason that activities such as music, art, literature, sports and other forms of leisure have survived. The essential ingredient for concentration — whether it happens when reading a poem or building a sand castle — is that it involves a challenge that matches one’s ability.

I especially like the last part, “it involves a challenge that matches one’s ability.” To me that says: being totally engaged in a situation–a lively, active time. I remember when my old beau, Scott, was taking Religious Studies course on the spiritual experience (I don’t remember the specifics, it was over 15 years ago) and he asked me about a time in which I felt at peace, content, happy. I immediately thought about all of the afternoons I had spent at the stable with my horse. It didn’t matter if I was riding, mucking the stall, grooming, or cleaning the tack. Every day was new, unpredictable, and, yes, “involved a challenge that matched my ability.”

I’m still a bit amazed at the whole lot of information found. I look forward to incorporating it into letting it be easy. I’d love to hear about your thoughts/experiences re: happiness in the context of the above info.

“If only we’d stop trying to be happy we could have a pretty good time.”
–Edith Wharton

Nothing like starting the morning laughing with Java John’s Rita & Patrick.

“Let’s get wild and crazy this morning,” I said to Patrick, “How about a soy chai latte with a shot of espresso?”

Rita heard the “Let’s get wild” part and asked, “What’d you go for?”

“I’m stepping out this morning!” and told her my request.

“Ooh, you gotta get out more, girl!” she shot back.

Ya think? :)

Like I said, nothing like starting the morning with a big laugh shared with others…

I love reading about other people’s thoughts and philosophies on sustainable economic models. Here is an excerpt from from Dave Pollard’s recent post called Creating the Jobs We Want.

It is the only sustainable economic model, the only economy that can allow each of us to do exactly what we love, what we’re uniquely good at, in service for others — what we were meant to do. If we do it together, it need not be quite so scary. We can create the jobs we want, and, in the process, set ourselves and our world free.

I was feeling this sentiment when I wrote about Wendy, the personal chef, who has created a work life balance that combines her skills, passion, and great marketability. Dave takes this one step further by putting the individual’s efforts together with others who have the same drive of purpose. He isn’t just talking about individuals making a difference, he is talking about a revolution of the entire economic system. Go Dave. :)

[Just want the tips? Scroll down to the bottom of the post.]

I had the role of General Evaluator (evaluates the meeting on the whole) at our Toastmasters meeting this morning. Yesterday I was thinking about the criteria for a well run meeting.

#1 Starts on Time.

One of the things I love about Toastmasters is that we start on time. Uhhh, except for the Division Contest on Saturday which started 30 minutes late (ouch!) And of which I was co-chair (super ouch!)

For me, being on time is an issue of respect. I’ve read about people who refuse to do business with someone who can’t show up on time!

While the trigger for this thought process was our Toastmasters contest on Saturday night, it is relevant for any meeting, event, or situation in which more than one person is involved (hmmm, that pretty much covers most of what we do!)

In any meeting or event, each person plays a role that contributes to the success of the experience. In the contest, whether speaker, Toastmaster, Sergeant at Arms, or audience support, each role is important.

Of course, there are also a few parameters which set the stage for the event to happen. Namely, parameters such as when and where. We agree upon these factors ahead of time–it’s not some secret we need to figure out.

If I cause a meeting to be late because I’m not prepared–perhaps I didn’t leave the house early enough–it’s as if I’m saying that my experience is more important than everyone else’s. This is why I feel it is an issue of respect.

Of course, sometimes it’s more complicated, for example, your spouse is late coming home and you have a sick toddler who cannot be left alone.

So what do do? This is when we get resourceful. This is when we ask for help. This is when we kick into a super-communicative mode. I change the pronoun here to we intentionally, because this is when we, as a team, show our solidarity and help the contest (event, meeting, whatever) stay on track–despite the mishaps.

Being on time tips (especially for those running the meeting)

• Finish preparations a couple of hours before you are supposed to leave.
• Plan on arriving earlier than necessary. This accommodates for unexpected situations. The farther you need to drive, the more cushion time to allow.
• Cell phones, while not appropriate during an event, are a huge help in problem solving before an event. Make sure other key people have your phone number and that you have theirs.
• Take the relevant phone list for the event if all numbers you might need aren’t already in your address book.
• If your being on time is dependent on coordination with another person, have at least one idea for a backup plan should that person be delayed.

There are a few cornerstones that help me to live my best life. One of them is called My Time and I try to do it daily.

During this time I explore ideas for future services, sometimes work on new articles, speeches, or the book, & sometimes work through confusing situations to determine a good course of action. Often, this time evolves out of my daily check-in (introduced in the article Cleansing Our Time) What is present in every My Time session is pen and paper.

You can imagine my delight when I saw Merlin Mann’s post recently about Catching the Brain Rain on his 43 Folders blog. He introduces this as “a way of setting aside a few minutes each day for firewalled creativity through idea generation and capture.” A techie way of saying, “time for you to develop and play with ideas.”

He suggests 10 minutes a day. For me, it takes 5-10 minutes to just get out of “get stuff done” headspace. I recommend 30 minutes. That said, I realize that people have different needs for this Brain Rain time. Because so much of my work is based on idea development, 60 minutes a day is preferred and more often allows me that feeling of, “aaah, I’ve made progress!”

Merlin’s post includes a list of suggestions for your daily practice. I’m adding the following:

Do what you need to do to establish this as Your time.

• turn your phone ringers off
• close your email program
• close your door and put a sign on it asking for privacy (mine says, “please leave a note or come back later”)

Of all the various tools that can help you live a simple life, I cannot emphasize enough how powerful this one is. And it is so Simple!! Fundamentally, what do we all want? We want to speak our truth. Our truth doesn’t come out when we are running around like “chickens with our heads cut off.” Taking time daily to let our soul speak out (because that is what we are really talking about above!) gives respect to that voice.

Enjoy.

(Article first appeared in the Spring 2006 Wild Mountain Yoga Center Newsletter.)

Why do you cleanse? Most likely to rid your body of toxins. Toxins get in the way of optimal health. Heavy metal and food toxins are the most obvious culprit–not so obvious are the toxins of stress.

Some people don’t recognize symptoms of stress. They don’t understand that poor sleep, irritability, low energy, increasing apathy in their interests, and feelings of anxiousness can be caused by stress-induced chemical imbalances in the brain. Yes, stress creates toxins and you can cleanse these too.

How often have you thought, “Too much to do, too little time”? Overloading our plates with too many responsibilities, given our available time, is a very real cause of stress.

Somewhere between too much and too little is the path that’s just right for you. Here are 3 tools to help you create that path. They may take dedication and practice to become a natural part of your life, but they are well worth it!

Tool #1: Practice a daily check-in.

Give yourself a calm, quiet time during which the voice of your intuition is given the floor. With your monkey-chatter ego taking a break, this is a perfect opportunity to engage in dialogue with your intuition in order to plan your schedule. I often use a simple Q&A format. Some specific examples of questions are listed under the following tools.

Tool #2: Allow yourself to say “No”.

When asked to take on a responsibility, get the parameters of the project (job/role/event/whatever) and a night to sleep on it. During your daily check-in time, ask, “Is this responsibility in line with my priorities? Is the opportunity in the best interest of all concerned?”

Tool #3: Create a realistic ToDo list.

It is amazing how much power our ToDo list can have over our sense of accomplishment. Common: attempting 8 hours worth of ToDos in a 4-hour period. During check-in time, ask questions along the lines of, “Considering my priorities, what are the best items for me to do today?” Allow the list to be smaller than you think you can complete; be compassionate with yourself. Be aware of allowing time for eating, taking quiet time, correspondence, and spending some time with loved ones.

These three tools help me to cleanse my time on a regular basis. They help me to lead a more calm, mindful day that is in line with my priorities. They could help you to do the same.

Being realistic about how you spend your time inevitably shifts the focus to quality (not quantity!) And the more good you have in your life, the less toxins you’ll need to cleanse later.

Through her business Project Simplify, Shawn Tuttle co-creates customized solutions to the admin and operating challenges of small businesses and the self-employed.

For more info visit www.projectsimplify.com.

After many back-and-forths, Lance and I have finally chiselled out a bio page for yours truly, which you can read here. It will be linked to from the About page and the Press Room.

It’s always a challenge to write a description of oneself, so I’m glad that Lance was able to take the raw info and draft something that struck the right tone while still being functional/descriptive. Let me know what else you’d like to know!