Take a few steps away from that blob so you can see what it’s made of—in other words, take inventory. Once you have a clear understanding of the parts, you’ll be poised to clear out the dead weight, leaving you more available for the good stuff. You’ll also have a better awareness of your limitations when considering new opportunities. Happily, you won’t only be focusing on the blob, you’ll also take stock of the positive influences on your life. Because if clearing out the dead weight makes space for the good, then you’ll want to have some direction and guidance for where you want to go, right? Of course! 

This journey of taking inventory will be covered in 3-part series. We’ll start with the drains and finish up with the nourishers. To make the most of these articles, you’ll want to have pen and paper handy.

Understanding drains
Have you ever set up an irrigation system? When you lay the irrigation tubing, the first one to go down will be the big one, say a 3/4″ diameter tube. If that were the only tube hooked up to your water source, all the water would flow out the other end of that tube. But that’s not why you set up the irrigation system! You have multiple plants you want watered. So you punch in smaller feeder tubes to get water to each plant. Now when you turn the water on, each plant on the system receives some of the water. The amount of flow doesn’t change, but the quantity that reaches the end of the tube is less because water is being routed to the plants . Theoretically, if you hooked up enough feeder tubes, no water would reach the end of your main tube. 

Getting the picture? You have a finite amount of energy, and there are feeder tubes extending to your unfinished projects, physical things and commitments. Each of these is a draw on your flow of energy. Just like your eyes can be bigger than your stomach in a great restaurant, it’s easy to say “yes” to commitment that you don’t have the time for. Saying “no” might be just what someone else wants to hear in order to step up and expand their horizons!

The First Inventory: Time Commitments
It’s so easy to say “yes” to new commitments. It makes sense, really. Being involved in various activities is how you engage with others, express your interests, develop skills, and/or progress professionally. However, even if you love all the responsibilities that you are involved in, having too many has an adverse effect. Benefits gained and given in these activities at first diminish and then are lost when the negative impacts of overly-packed schedules, stress, and disorganization take over. Personal health is often sacrificed as your brain assures you that you’ll take care of yourself “just as soon as X is finished….” which is then replaced by Y, and then Z. 

Even worse is being committed to responsibilities that you don’t care about. Whether through habit, a difficulty saying “no”, or a feeling of obligation, ending up in situations that don’t interest you depletes your energy and motivation. 

Now is the time to use your pen and paper to make a list. Label it “Roles and Responsibilities”. Include family, work, play, community… all those labels that you answer to.
For example, mine include:

Now you’ll go back through your list, tagging each item with a symbol to indicate: “Good,” “Needs to change,” or “Outta here”. Do a quick read-through of the following definitions before going back and marking your list.

Note: Be aware of the “should gremlin”. There is a perfect mix of roles that is right for you in this phase of your life. It may be different than what you thought it would be last year or even last month. The key here is to be honest with yourself and listen to your intuition or gut feeling. Just because you “can” doesn’t mean you “should”. 

?  Needs to change  ?
Put a question mark by each item that needs some adjusting to be right for you. Maybe you want to spend less/more time on it. Maybe you could shift from an active to an advisory role. Maybe you just need boundaries. In any case, these are the ones that you still want in your life once you have set the proper parameters for them.

X  Outta here  X
Put an “X” in front of the ones that just shouldn’t be in your life anymore. Perhaps you’ve stayed with it because it’s been easier to maintain than deal with disengaging. Perhaps you agreed out of guilt, or you felt you were the only one who could do the job. Maybe you get a pit in your stomach, a feeling of dread, or experience strong resistance. Maybe you constantly procrastinate your duties for this role. Maybe it’s more subtle, like a void feeling that indicates zero connection for you. Remember: if it’s not good for you, it’s not good for anyone.

Just making this list may inspire you to take action to eliminate your time drains. Whether you take action immediately or not, the process to disengage responsibly takes time. Hang on to your list…but where to put it? In newsletter issue #38 I recommended a simplification binder. If you don’t have one, a file labeled “Simplify” should do the trick.

Doing a personal inventory like this helps give you a realistic understanding of how your decisions in the past are affecting your life now. They also give you more power to alter habits because you’ve demystified the amorphous blob by taking the step of identifying what needs to change. When combined with your Simplicity Statement, understanding your inventory of commitments helps you evaluate whether a possible addition will be supported by your personal “irrigation” system. 

In the next article: We’ll tackle another major source of drainage - your stuff. (And if you dread doing that inventory, that’s probably an indicator that that’s exactly what you need to do. So don’t skip out on part two, OK packrats? ;-))